Jobs, Jealousy and Sausages what a combination!

My “date” with Mr. Europe sorry to report was uneventfully. We had a few dinners and went to the movies to see The Bank Job. You know me by now I don’t make up sh*t to make it sound more exciting than it really is.

After going on those dreadful job interviews I was offered 2 positions; the front desk @ the dental office in Cambridge and the $17/hr position. I also went on another interview on Monday and they pay $16/hr, it is close by my home, but will cause a problem down the line because I keep forgetting that I am moving to Boston and I am not willing to travel that far for $16. Forget about it (hear my Boston accent). Another job contacted me for a second interview, but I never called them back because I just can’t be bothered. So, I’ve settled on the $17/hr job and I will start on the 28th. Next I need to find a place to live with a roommate. I have a headache just thinking about it. Presenting myself in front of others to judge me and decide whether or not I am good enough to live with. I’m aggravated with the thought of moving out of my place. I mean couldn’t I possibly just stay here and just change everything else? Of course I can’t, so I’m going to have to suck it up and continue doing what I’ve set out to do. Me and my big ideas. This is one of those times when you wish you never told anyone anything and kept it to your self, so if you changed your mind no one would know except you. This reminds me of when I was applying to grad schools and I told everyone my first pick and they kept asking me if I heard from the school it was so much pressure I wish I hadn't told them anything. I did get in to my school, but we all know what happened after I got in and started right?

Damn it! I wanted to tell you guys something, but I can’t because I already shared it with people in my not online life. F*ck! I need to really learn how to not share everything with my friends and save the good shit for you guys. I mean at least you all appreciate my bipolar (no offense to anyone who is) life and often times even give good advice via email (of course because most of you haven’t learned that the comments section is open for a reason. Just kidding I like the emails). Uh where was I? Anyway, I have graduated from eating a small (shut up) carton of Häagen-Dazs each evening to a huge carton of Breyers ice cream if you don’t know the difference in the size google the images you will be just as disgusted with me as I am. Obviously jumping from one brand of ice cream to another is criminal, but that wasn’t my only problem I am over eating and as I have learned in the past I am an emotional eater, so THERAPY is in order. I have to face my fear of the therapist, actually I went on a date with a psychologist last week and I found myself venting like I was his patient. If I wasn’t so cute I’m sure he would think I was a basket case and would most likely never speak to me again, but luckily for me I am hot and so I made another appointment oops I mean date with him for Thursday.

Have you ever heard those stories about mothers who are insanely jealous of their daughters? Well, here’s a first I am jealous of my mother. My mother not only looks good at 50 (50 is the new 35), but she has a great sex life (yes, I know about her sex life) and wonderful friends. Her social calendar is packed with dinner dates with her fabulous friends (they are like the ladies of Sex and the City seriously) and mini vacations with her BOYFRIEND. My mother has been married twice, has 2 children she gave birth to, works 2 jobs because she likes it and still finds time to fit in her friends, family, children that are not even hers, plans to start a new business, real estate courses and a BOYFRIEND. I am almost half (not quite I’m older than 25) her age and she has more energy and a better social life than me. I am exhausted after going on 3 job interviews and a twenty-minute drive. I’m truly bothered that my life isn’t as fulfilled. This is one of the MANY reasons for my “experiment”. What child is jealous of their parent? That’s just sick, sick I tell you. I only hope to be as good of a mother, daughter, friend, ex-wife, stepparent, and colleague as my mother. Well, I don’t plan on being an ex-wife, but you get the point.

Lately, I have NO sex drive, none, nada. The only time I am turned on is when I think about the hot sex TD&H (for you newbies Tall Dark and Handsome) and I once had then SWOOSH I’m wetter than a slip and slide.
I went to his place yesterday and I was not even fazed by the scent of his cologne, his fabulous pad, his sexy sexy sexy chocolate body or his dreamy eyes. Nothing, I didn’t want sex, not even a massage (Raquel's word for getting her cooter (her word not mine) licked) Have I gone mad? Perhaps if I stopped eating so much ice cream and feeling bloated I may be in the mood. Ok, effective immediately I have decided I am no longer buying ice cream. That’s it! I am prohibited from eating creamy, smooth ice cream for the next 2 months. (Of course my fingers are crossed I can’t possibly keep that promise)

Today is opening day for The Red Sox at Fenway Park, so it was pure havoc near Commonwealth Avenue. I tried to get down there for the nostalgia and the sausages with onions and peppers wearing my pink Coco Crisp T-shirt (I met him a few months ago he was very shy and cute as hell. I didn’t know who he was at the time. Imagine sitting practically on top of him and eating off of his plate and not introducing your self properly? Only me), but there were just too many people down there and the lines were ridiculous. I was defeated, no sausages for me. Bastards! So, I walked around the corner by myself (because I have no friends) to Pizzeria Unos in Kenmore Square and ordered a cheeseburger (not even a pizza who does that at a pizza joint?) while once again being ungrateful (shit I’m alive aren’t I?) and sulking about trivial things like voluntarily moving out of my apartment, working for $17/hr, eating more ice cream than any one person should consume in a sitting, my mothers wonderful social life, having no sex drive and FINALLY not being able to have my first sausage onion and pepper sub of the baseball season. WTF?

Whew! I feel better now. -Adios Brunette Bombshell